I am a dinosaur

guest blog post by Marcus Fernando

Character enters, taking giant steps.

Today, I’m a dinosaur. I wasn’t always a dinosaur…but today I am. Being a parent does that to you. I think I’m a stegosaurus. Yes, I’m pretty sure I am.

Character hops from leg to leg.

I’m glad…I can be at home with them.

I’m sad…I don’t always have time for their games.

I’m glad…I work from home.

I’m sad…I have to be on a computer so often.

I’m glad…they want me to play with them.

I’m sad…I’m no longer a child.

When you become a parent you suddenly realise how fragile we all are. You become more aware of your own limited mortality. It’s ironic, isn’t it, that at that exact moment of realisation, you find yourself in the company of little people who think you’re indestructible? Yes, to my boys I am Captain Scarlet….or more usually Captain Black…or maybe a Mysteron. I’m always the Baddie. To them, I can never die. Will never die. But to me…I just want to last for as much of their lives as possible.

Character hops again.

I’m glad…they sometimes call me by my first name.

I’m sad…that as an adult I’m a different species.

I’m glad…I can teach them things.

I’m sad…that I don’t know enough to fill their minds.

I’m glad…that I’m their friend.

I’m sad…that I’m the person they must one day defeat.

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I play a variety of Baddies: Darth Vader from Star Wars, The Hood from Thunderbirds (apparently I have the right hair style), or maybe Bloefeld from James Bond. Come to think of it, none of them have hair, do they? Probably just a coincidence.

The other day they decided I was Superman. A superhero. Not a Baddie. This was a surprise. At last, my chance to shine. (character adopts Superman pose and hums theme tune) Then I found out why: they had endless supplies of Kryptonite…apparently. Sofa cushions. So…Batman and Spiderman demolished Superman using Kryptonite sofa cushions. I fought well…like any good superhero. But I lost. I always have to lose.

Today I wanted to be a raptor. You know, something with teeth and claws. But they wouldn’t let me. That would give me too much of an edge. So I’m a stegosaurus. Of course, they’ll be raptors. Maybe even a Tyrannosaurus. But me?…How am I going to win when I’m a vegetarian?!!…With a brain the size of a walnut?

Character hops

I’m glad….I can be with them.

I’m sad…I won’t be there for them for ever.

I’m sad…they won’t want me to be there for them for ever.

I’m sad…I haven’t got the energy to keep up with their games.

Yes, today I’m a dinosaur.

But yesterday…I was a Superhero.

 

  • Notnow Collective are taking “Wonderwoman The Naked Truth” on a national tour, we just have to re-shape the show a bit to fit it in our car. If you want to help us travel more easily, you can support our crowdfunding campaign here.

 

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